Marriage, family, and faith: the conflict of conversion

Two topics to avoid at a dinner party: religion and politics.
Two topics to avoid at a South Asian dinner party: religion and marriage.
We can clink glasses to cross-caste marriages, smile politely at cross-cultural couples, and perhaps even think it fashionable to have mixed-race children.
But if the word ‘conversion’ comes up, we fall nothing short of an obvious eye-widen and a suppressed gasp.
“Did she really convert for him?”

Kavitha Nair was born into a South Indian Hindu Brahmin family. By the time she decided to marry Ryan Thomas, she had already converted to Christianity. Now she is Kavitha Thomas, an insider and outsider of two different worlds.
“I always had a rule about dating someone that was not Hindi,” Kavitha said, “not only because of what my parents would think but because I could never see how a family would work with two completely different belief systems. Ryan and I ended up being interested in each other because we spent a lot of time together and one thing led to another. However, we did decide not to move forward because we didn’t think it could work.”
Although their relationship was put on hold, Kavitha’s growing interest in another faith was not. She was drawn to Christianity, and eventually converted. But it was a fact she initially hid from her parents.
“While I wish I didn’t have to hide my faith from them as long as I did, I’m not sure I would have been equipped to handle their reaction. My faith was a bigger challenge than who I would marry. My conversion changed our relationship completely since they felt really hurt and betrayed. Since then my mom especially was not able to carry a conversation with me without getting upset. Things have improved over the last year since being married and moving away but our relationship is not the same as it was before. My dad was really upset initially but at some point he realized that our relationship was more important.”

http://www.southasianparent.com/friends-and-love/marriage-family-and-faith-the-conflict-of-conversion/